Tuesday, November 12, 2024

I'm scared... but so what!

5:51am- one day I'll wake up and be completely ok.

7:06am- I think I'm still the same person... I'm not acting on it. But mentally I'm still putting out those vibrations. An i think that's why I'm still getting the same thing I've been getting. 

7:52am- it hurts me that I'm doing well this alone. I'm literally doing it alone. No family no friends no siblings no lover. Just me building this life brick by brick. I got no one to call on for help but they can call me for help. To borrow money to get advice... Idk man, I'm hurt about a lot of things but I'm praying. I'm asking God to help me. To be with me. 

12:20pm-omg the baby just called me. Mail daughter just called me from her sister phone. But like why would God do this to me... Is this a sign? 

2:20pm- really don't know why that happen to me today. But I'm going to thank God and I'm still not going to reach out to her. I won't change who I am because of her. I'm a kind loving person and will remain that way. 

10:07pm- God is good to me. An no matter what I'm going to be ok. I'm going to keep building my life keep on this path of having more. When my father died he left me nothing but I won't do that to my son's. I'll always be a nice loving guy. Help children wherever I can. Love black women and teach them whatever I know. I want to be loved and give love but first I need to heal and better myself so God can send me a woman to love and be loved by her fully. 

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